The Importance of Separation before Divorce

Before anyone can seek a divorce, separation must occur. Many states require separation as part of their specific divorce laws while others may not. A separation is a time for you to get your finances together, talk with your children about where they want to live, and give yourself time to see if divorce is the best solution for your troubled marriage.

Most states expect a couple to be officially separated in order to be granted a divorce. The law in a lot of states specifies that you must be separated from your spouse for a certain amount of time before starting the divorce process. Staying in separate bedrooms in your marital residence is not what the courts intend when they say separation; typically it involves living in completely different residences.

Usually, the decision to separate is mutual and voluntary, but sometimes desertion is a factor. When a spouse leaves with no intent to return, it is called desertion. On the other hand, constructive desertion is when you are forced to leave the relationship, as in cases of domestic violence. You will not be held accountable for desertion in this case because the court will recognize your attempt to protect your children and yourself.

Of all the proceedings that occur during a divorce, separation is usually the beginning step. Separation is intended to give both spouses the opportunity to divide up personal property and figure out who will live in the marital residence. When children are involved in a divorce settlement, the separation period is when parents choose where their children will live. It can also be a time when parents discuss custody issues such as whether or not joint physical custody is a possibility. Other things can be settled during the separation period. Spouses should choose between vehicles, pets, furniture, and even electronics. When the separation period is over and no plans of reconciliation are possible, then both spouses need to begin consulting with their attorneys.

A period of separation can be used to resolve any financial matters before going ahead with a divorce. You need to do this because, if your ex-spouse defaults on any financial obligations in the future, you need to protect yourself against their creditors. When producing your finances to the attorney, make a list of all assets and liabilities that are currently held. All joint accounts should be transferred into your name only; this includes credit cards also.

You should consult your broker before reissuing your stock in your name. If the previous broker looked after both your and your spouse's accounts, you may need to search for a new one. To exclude your spouse from a will or a trust that you might have, you will have to change it. The divorce settlement process will run more smoothly if you have all of your documents and changes in writing.

Much like a divorce, separation involves a lot of thought and consideration. Decisions should not be made hastily when you are considering ending your marriage, and the well-being and stability of the children need to be thought of first. How couples handle a separation can set the tone as to how their divorce proceeding will go once the required period of time has expired.

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Charles Sellestor has counseled many couples who believe divorce is the only answer. Before finding Sacramento divorce lawyer, he recommends a time of separation to try to work out any issues. While the couples still need to look for a QDRO in divorce like Keegan & Myers, more marriages are saved through a time of agreed upon separation.

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